I looked from my 9 year old son to the last brownie on the plate. I wanted that brownie. I had plans for it, which included a cup of coffee and uninterrupted quiet time. I really really wanted that brownie. I glanced at my son’s hopeful expression, “Can I have the last one?”. 
‘NO!’ was on the tip of my tongue. It wasn’t a pleasant no either. It was a selfish, leave me alone and let me eat my brownie in peace kind of no. What was wrong with me? Wasn’t this the same child that 9 years ago I had snuggled as a newborn, promising him I’d protect him and do everything within my power to make his life great? And I couldn’t give up the brownie?
In the next two seconds my mind criticized me. How many scenes similar to this have played out between him and his siblings? With my good mommy voice I am constantly reminding them to share, play nice, not be so selfish, think of others, how do you think Jesus treated his brothers and sisters?
I am not going to lie. I have had moments like this before. Many times before and I’ve made some conclusions about them.
I need a time out
I have noticed that these situations usually come at a time where I feel drained or overwhelmed. I need to take 20 minutes, an afternoon, whatever I can manage, to focus on something I like to do or chat with someone who helps ground me. I need to take a break. Sometimes its not about that last brownie at all. Its about me giving until I’m empty and not refilling. When you are enjoying your life, those little things are no longer a big deal.
Us Moms are still fighting our sinful nature
We try hard to teach our children right from wrong. We try to be good examples, to practice what we preach, but the truth is that we struggle just as much as our children do to overcome our natural inborn selfishness. Recognize this, repent of it, and move on!
Its ok to say no!
There are 7 of us in our family and often times things just are not fair. One kid gets hand me downs, the other gets new shoes. They have to wait to eat because the baby is fussy and supper is late or give up their afternoon of freetime to watch one of their siblings play soccer. Its life and I pray that learning to let go of the little things now will help them handle the big things later on!
And for those of you who are wondering how the brownie situation turned out. I did let him have it 🙂
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