Category: Loss

My Heart’s Answered Prayer

We were sick last week. The kids were cranky, tired, and throwing up. I was sore, tired and feverish with strep. Parenting is at it’s most difficult when taking care of sick kids while being unwell yourself. My heart was heavy as Rebekah’s birthday approached. I had been determined not to cry the whole week […]

When we Blame God for Pain and Suffering

It’s 4:30 a.m. and I awaken with a start. I listen for a second wondering what woke me. My toddler is snoring softly beside me and the two of us are warm and comfy snuggled together. I can hear Joshua breathing through the baby monitor and the gurgling of Caleb’s turtle tank filter. Lines from […]

The Song that Came to Pass

I would like to take you all on a journey with me today.  Be patient because I’m not sure this post even has a point and I’m probably breaking all of the “how to write a good post” rules, but my heart is heavy and I want to share something with you. We keep a […]

Thankfulness in the Face of Hope

Last year I wrote Thankfulness in the Face of Grief. It was written with a knife. The pain in my heart as I struggled to praise God was nearly unbearable. Is it possible to experience thankfulness when looking back? It’s hard to comprehend that an entire year has gone by. 365 days of grief, sorrow, […]

One of my Favorite Sentiments

It has been a rough couple of weeks for us.  I was a mess leading up to Rebekah’s year anniversary and it has taken me a week to get back on my feet. The boys have been my first priority and spending time with them has pushed me forward (in spite of losing several games […]

Anxiety, a Lesser known Part of my Grief

Anxiety has become far too familiar to me since Rebekah’s accident. Just as grief is now a part of every aspect of my life, anxiety has crept in also. I’ve been told I need to redirect my thoughts.  Have any of you tried to do that?  Seriously, it is hard! I’ve also been told to […]

When You Want to Run Away- Do!

Raise your hand if you have ever felt like running away. For months after Rebekah’s accident, we considered selling the house and moving. I would mention it to people and was always met with the same sympathetic nod and “you know you can’t run away from grief”. I know I am not alone!  Stress, frustration, […]

Emotions are all I have to Share

For days now I have been trying to write something encouraging.  I’ve been trying to put my feelings and experiences into a neat little package and present it to you all in a positive way. I can’t.  Not this week.  Today I will simply release my feelings in the messy mixed up way they are […]

The Faith Cycle

It has been 9 months since I lost my Rebekah.  Nine horrible months.  The journey of brokenness, pain, doubt, anger, anxiety, and confusion has been the worst experience of my life.  I almost feel the need to shout to the world that if I can survive this, then I can survive anything. The most awful […]

When Sorrow Steals your Joy

I was watching a dvd of kids singing Bible songs.  The kids were dancing and smiling and the songs were lighthearted-the way children’s songs should be.  Joel was clapping his hands and Joshua’s dimple was showing.  Something about the simple lyrics of God’s love and goodness made my own heart sing. I kept thinking “The […]

What to do when Your Faith isn’t Enough

I think being a mom is awesome.  It’s a noble calling- loving and caring for your children. The hugs and kisses, “mama, read me a book”, and “watch what I can do!” make my life great.  The cards my kids made me for Mother’s Day and my birthday were given to me with huge smiles […]

Who Will Pick Me Strawberries?

 Spring has FINALLY arrived for good now.  The mud has dried up and the grass is green in places where the sun hits the most.  The kids are on the look out for the first dandelions and the robins spend their mornings in my freshly tilled garden. I have been cleaning the dead remains from […]

When you Cry Alone

This morning I made my bed as I do every morning.  I pulled the soft comforter to the top and carefully placed my pillows, gray first and then green and finally purple accents.  I smiled because I like things neat and pretty and this fell into that.  On an impulse, I went into Rebekah’s room […]

Happy First Birthday in Heaven

I wish I could explain to you the intensity of the “firsts” that we have experienced over the past seven months.  I remember Caleb’s birthday, just a month after the accident.  I was in a dark overwhelming fog that affected every aspect of my thoughts.  Micah’s party, just three weeks later, found me sobbing at […]

Hi, I am Heather! I am a mom of five, homeschooler, homesteader, and lover of all things chocolate. I am excited to share your faith and parenting journeys with you. Whether you are here looking to grow your faith, heal from loss, find homeschool resources, or hope to find inspiration in raising godly children, you are in the right place. So, grab your favorite hot beverage, curl up in your comfy chair, and stay awhile.

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